viernes, 8 de abril de 2011

I promise

Hace un momento estaba pensando en llamarte como me pediste. Pero recordé la forma en la que, siempre que te llamo, parece ser un mal momento.
Pensaba en eso, y en sugerirte que pasaras a visitarme por la noche. Tu y yo solos.
Pero entonces las letras que le escribiste a él saltaron frente a mis ojos, danzando en burla.
Por la mañana pensaba en escribirte una canción en la que las palabras "tuyo" e "incondicional" figuraban un par de veces. Pero entonces, la ironía en tus frases salto de entre mis recuerdos, y la forma en la que aceptaste tus sentimientos por él relució como la luz cuando se ve por primera vez.
Justo ahora, antes de empezar estas lineas que intentan aferrarme a una linea de pensamiento, planeaba mi acercamiento, mi cambio de ideales, la modificación de mis creencias y mis escasos valores.
Pero entonces, la canción que escucho compulsivamente para alejar los pensamientos de ti, reveló su lírica cual epifanía; No es que no me quieras. Es que nuestro concepto de querer es diferente.
Y así entonces, comprendí que de alguna forma tienes la capacidad para querer a varias personas a tu manera, y yo solamente soy capaz de querer a una a la vez.
Comprendí que en tu vida las cosas son distintas a como son en la mía. Recordé nuestro daltonismo.
Vemos las mismas cosas, pero en tonos distintos, en distintos significantes.
Te amo y te respeto. Y defendería tus ideas frente a cualquiera que quiera destrozarlas.
Las defiendo incluso aun sin entenderlas, o sin estar seguro que son correctas.
Supongo que para mi un beso no es solo un beso, y la fidelidad no es solo una palabra.

Sigo pensando en llamarte, y he decidido hacerlo.
Para ti es solo una llamada, para mi es una promesa mas cumplida.

Y las consecuencias de hacerlo o no parecen igual llevar al mismo camino.

domingo, 20 de febrero de 2011

I don't love the way you lie...

I can't tell you what it really is.
I can only tell you what it feels like.
And right now, there's a steel knife in my windpipe.
I can't breathe, but I still fight while I can fight.
As long as the wrong feels right it's like I'm in flight.
High off him love, drunk from my hate, it's like I'm huffin' paint.
And I love it, the more I suffer, I suffocate.
And right before I'm about to drown, he resuscitates me,
He fuckin' hates me, and I love it.
"Wait, where you goin'?"
"I'm leavin' you!"
"No you ain't! Come back!"
We're runnin' right back, here we go again!
It's so insane, cause when it's goin' good, it's goin' great.
I'm Superman with the wind at his back, he's Lois Lane.
But when it's bad it's awful, I feel so ashamed.
I snap, "Who's that dude? I don't even know his name."
I laid hands on him, I'll never stoop so low again.
I guess I don't know my own strength.

You ever love somebody so much, you can barely breathe.
When you with 'em you meet, and neither one of you even know what hit 'em.
Got that warm fuzzy feeling, yeah them chills used to get 'em.
Now you're getting fuckin' sick of lookin' at 'em.
You swore you'd never hit 'em, never do nothin' to hurt 'em.
Now you're in each other's face, spewin' venom in your words when you spit 'em.
You push pull each other's hair, scratch claw,
Hit 'em, throw 'em down, pin 'em, so lost in the moments when you're in 'em.
It's the rage that's the culprit, controls you both.
So they say it's best to go your separate ways.
Guess that they don't know ya, 'cause today, that was yesterday.
Yesterday is over, it's a different day.
Sound like broken records playin' over,
But you promised her, next time you'll show restraint
You don't get another chance.
Life is no Nintendo game, but you lied again.
Now you get to watch her leave out the window.
Guess that's why they call it window pane.

Now I know we said things, did things, that we didn't mean.
And we fall back into the same patterns, same routine.
But your temper's just as bad as mine is, you're the same as me.
When it comes to love you're just as blinded.
Baby please come back! It wasn't you, baby, it was me!
Maybe our relationship isn't as crazy as it seems.
Maybe that's what happens when a tornado meets a volcano.
All I know is I love you too much, to walk away though.
Come inside, pick up the bags off the sidewalk!
Don't you hear sincerity in my voice when I talk?
Told you this is my fault, look me in the eyeball!
Next time I'm pissed I'll aim my fist at the dry wall!
Next time? There won't be no next time!
I apologize, even though I know it's you who lie!
I'm tired of the games! I just want him back! I know he's liar!
If I ever try to fuckin' leave again,
I'ma tie me to the bed and set this house on fire!